Waitakere father Vaughan Harvey is following through on his threat and has listed his son for sale on Trade Me after he failed to clean the house as promised. The listing reads: “I now offer for sale one toothpick with a FREE son included (I’m sure there is probably some law which forbids me trafficking in humans, hence the toothpick) … Being a teenager he requires large amounts of food (meat and candy mostly, despite the fridge being full of fruit and veg). [He] uses power enough to run a small town (computer, TV, PlayStation and assorted electrical gadgets as well as always leaving the fridge door open). Unfortunately he is short-sighted and unable to see unwashed dishes, grime, towels on the floor or skid marks. Requires 14 hours of sleep per day. You would need a soundproof room as he either slaughters pigs in there or plays heavy metal (sounds the same to me).”
From today’s sideswipe.